Its about making memories worth repressing
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize