i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
did i walk over a car last night?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
