it was like eating out sand paper
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I need to wash the frat house off of me
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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