You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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