even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
