I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
