I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Randomize
