We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
