chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Randomize
