FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize