At least make sure they are 18
Why
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize