she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
