Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
