Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
