The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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