Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I had to cum in my sink.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
