She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Randomize
