What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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