We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
