at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
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