Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize