i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
false alarm. still invincible.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
