so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Randomize
