Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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