i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
