bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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