you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
