My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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