I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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