Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
