With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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