And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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