What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
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