There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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