who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
