worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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