respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize