don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
