Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
