This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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