i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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