how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
