I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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