i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
