so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
