Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Still dying that you shit outside
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize