Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
