If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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