i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
