Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
